October 1st.
[Said by this guy we know, when asked for supper ideas] "Do I look like I have a purse? Ask me how to punch someone or pee on stuff and I'll give you a list."
September 15th. In the thick of it.
"He was perfect. He smells like milk. I broke up with him."
August 30th. Post-friendship cultivation weekend:
"Come quick! I'm having a shotgun emergency!"
July 11th.
"Imagine how bad you'd feel about your life if you woke up next to a large drunk child?!"
(And how.)
July 10th. Saturday morning hangover giggles:
"[Our dog] smells like beer. Wait, maybe that's just my face."
"I wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating cookies."
"He has cookies?!"
"Did I say 'take Plan B'? I meant 'make a plan B'."
